Monday, August 31, 2009

Looking ahead


Many things to look forward to. A lot still to process from this past year.

When I was leaving Germany, I cried. I had a great time driving first to Gera and then on to Karlsruhe with Robert's Mom, Helmut and his two brothers (we dropped Steffen off in Gera). Then I had a relaxed evening home with Robert before we headed to Heidelberg the next morning. He met his new Ferienkurs class at the University - I tagged along, and was even able to sit in on his class. A small group of intermediate German students feeling very nervous about their language skills listened avidly to their teacher and "Betreuer" (that's Robert's job title) tell them in very slow and deliberate German what fun things would lie for them in the weeks ahead.

Sadly I would not be there with them, but with three big suitcases and awaiting parents there was nothing I could do but get on that plane in Frankfurt two days later. We had a fun birthday party at one of his friends apartments in which I introduced the concept of mixing vodka with cranberry juice (the "Cape Codder", although I've never heard anyone call it that), and was able to catch up with people that I hadn't seen since the previous summer. They were amazed at how much better my German had gotten over the year, and I must say I was quite proud in return. But at Birthday Party #2 the following night I couldn't control myself. As much as I wanted to celebrate with Robert's Karlsruhe friends (we were back in Karlsruhe at that point) I just could not comprehend the change lying ahead of me. I was going to miss him, that was clear, but I'm not sure that I was actually sad about leaving Berlin. I know I'll be back there, in some shape or form. I was simply overwhelmed at the inevitable and uncontrollable passage of time. Everybody was understanding when we left early to walk home.

I have had a wonderful month since I've been back. A weekend at Fisher's, nearly a week in Montreal, catching up with a lot of family, a quick adventure to NYC with my Mom, a couple days of sunshine and beaches on the cape, hiking to the Franconia Ridge, and helping with research for a documentary on the fall of the Berlin Wall. I have had a lot of calm days at home to spend with my Dad as well. Now the second phase of my summer will begin, as I will be heading to the airport to pick Robert up. It's September and the New England weather could not be more beautiful. Luckily for me and all those other people on the quarter system, I still have a month before classes start! Oh, and I have finally sort of exhausted the all the possibilities for finding things to do with all the pictures I took over this past year. An i-dvd slide show and two photo albums, and I am nearly pictured-out.

So essentially what I am trying to say is that I'm signing off on this blog for now as I plan on fully enjoying the rest of my summer. I'll check in with any news on this Fulbright application, and then, if that works out of course, you just might be hearing about new journeys to Germany in the future. So stay posted.

Auf den neusten Stand bringen

An update on my German.

Now that I am home a lot of people have asked me the following question: "So, you must be fluent now, right?" After thinking for a second how best to explain what I've managed to learn within a year and what I still need to work on, I simply respond, "Yeah, sort of." The truth is that I'm not sure I could ever be fluent in German. There are far too many grammatical rules and even more exceptions. Not only that, but the idioms and expressions I learn are quite impossible to translate. I think back to Nina and Robert speaking Deutschlisch, which means speaking English but directly translating everything from the German, hopefully exaggerating the German accents to atrocious levels. Their conversations resulted in such phrases as "Oh, I break together" and "I would like to become a beer please" and "press your thumbs that we have good weather tomorrow," none of which make much sense to a non-German speaker. These are funny pieces of the German-American conversation that I can now partake in. It makes perfect sense to me to use the verb "bekommen" to mean 'to receive' instead of 'to become'. Incidentally according to Jan that is the distinguishing factor of all German tourists in the US - they will consistently ask their waiters if they can become more bread or that if only they could become a schnitzel, they would be content.

German continues to frustrate me. I read a wonderful book that I had started in Berlin called Selam, Berlin by Yadé Kara. The book was written in German by a turkish woman, and was therefore much easier to understand than any academic texts I had read during the year. The sentences were short, to the point, umgangssprachlich - meaning slang - and often quite amusing. And yet there were still verbs that I had never encountered before. Kara used about ten different verbs to describe one of the character's yelling. When I think about it, we have all sorts of verbs to describe that in English - shouting, screaming, proclaiming angrily, raising one's voice - and that is one place I need to work on. Getting used to the more traditional German - the paragraph-long sentences, the roundabout way of describing something, the lack of antecedents, the verbs all the way at the end of the sentence/paragraph so that you have no idea what the action is all about - that will continue to mystify me till the end of my days.

By the end of the year I made strides in my conversational German. My listening and reading comprehension really was pretty good, but my writing struggled. You don't really know something (like a language, for instance) cold until you can write it all out. The fact is that if I didn't have the wonderful Jasna, one of the tutors for BCGS, helping me correct my papers, I probably would have sounded to my professors like a sixth-grader without a spell-checker. I felt so confident speaking with Anna, my roommate or with Diego, who complemented me on my German a few times. Robert knows exactly what I mean when I struggle to remember a word here and there, and Nancy and I tend to just switch to English when we're talking politics or getting in to something more complicated. When I would step into my German class, level B 2,2, despite my general confidence speaking, I would be reminded of how much I still needed to learn. Memorizing genitive forms of verbs, remembering that the plural forms of nouns does not always follow a pattern...

But I plan on staying as disciplined as possible (notice that I'm not guaranteeing anything) because I am in no way sick of German. It has become part of me, part of the way that I structure my sentences in English, really. I could hardly speak French when I went to Montreal because German prepositions kept coming out. I find myself occasionally forgetting the English word for something and needing to translate it from the German to express something while catching up with EB or Janna (of course they both understand these language confusions). I brought two of the best grammar books back with me - trust me, I've gone through MANY and they are the best - and I fully intend to take a day, or two days, or many days, and practice on my own. Keep building up my vocabulary, keep practicing my prepositions, keep sending emails to Germany not just to practice but of course to stay in touch, and maybe I'll even have a bit of time at the U of C to take an advanced German course this year. Too bad that I don't have time to make German a second major, but theoretically I could pass myself off as "being fluent" once I graduate with or without adding German to my Arts degree.

Some of my funniest memories from this past year involve my tendency to repeatedly misuse German verbs. I have many examples, and will try to elucidate some of the confusion.

Once after visiting a little (very) old town in central Germany I had promised to send pictures to Robert's Dad of our day trip. I was going to forward all the pictures to Anna's father, since he grew up in that same little town. The town was called "Weida". I mixed up the name, and put as the subject to both emails: "Weide!" Anna was very confused, and asked me the next day what "Weide" I was talking about. Apparently that can either mean a field, or be the adjective wide. I explained that I had been there and she exclaimed Oh! WeidA! Now I understand. Alas, I was a bit embarrassed that I sent Robert's Dad that email - after spending a whole day there you'd think I'd get the name right.

"Wir können alle zusammen knutschen" - This is something I said to Robert's Mom. The conversation was about what I will do once I move my mattress out of my apartment. Will there be anywhere for me to sleep? I answered, of course. My roommates have a lot of space, so I can join Anna in her bed and we can make out together. After seeing her stunned reaction Robert said, you mean kuscheln, not knutschen! I wanted to say sarcastically that Anna and I could cuddle together, not make out in her bed!

"Ich wünsche dir viele schöne Rutsche!" - There is an expression that people say at New Years, essentially meaning 'hope you have a good transition into the New Year'. But the verb they use to describe this transition is "slide", so it's more like sliding into the following year. But I took this literally. This came up after an almost christmas-time dinner at Judith's apartment. Just before leaving I said to David, Judith's boyfriend, that I wished him many happy slides in the New Year. As in I hoped he would get new slides, like the playground kind, to play with in 2009. He didn't tell me right then and there that I had mixed up the entire expression. Instead he told me a good few months later that the entire family had laughed about it as soon as I left their apartment. I don't think I will ever live that one down. But at least now I understand the whole slide reference. Just so you don't mix it up, the right way to say it is Ich wünsche dir einen guten Rutsch ins Neuen Jahr.

"Ich möchte gern mich von meinem Haar scheiden lassen" - I was getting a haircut, or at least planning on it. When I relayed these plans to my roommate, what I actually said was that I wanted to divorce myself from my hair. She thought for a moment, and asked, "Wait, you really want to get rid of all of it?" I had never had that intention, and said I just wanted to cut a little bit. That time I used the right word, and then she realized that I was confusing the verbs to cut one's hair - Haar schneiden lassen - which technically translates to let one's hair get cut - and to get a divorce - sich scheiden lassen. Whoops! I guess it is kind of funny that the way I used it still sort of made sense...

"Zahnbruste" - This was an awkward one. I was in the kitchen with Anna's older sister Melanie. Something happened to the tiny little sink in our bathroom, which rendered it unusable, so we all needed to crowd around the kitchen sink to brush our teeth. I asked Melanie if she could pass me my tooth breast. Yes, I am not kidding. I mixed up the word for breast - Brust - with brush - Burste. She looked at me as if I had two heads before realizing that I had just said it wrong, and then we laughed so hard that we couldn't concentrate on brushing our teeth.

Those are the examples I can think of right now. Perhaps more will come up, even some that I never even realized I was saying wrong. From these incidents I conclude that it would be a simple shame if I were so fluent as not to mix up any words anymore.

Best of (my) Berlin

<-- still my favorite place for people-watching and picture-taking, the Viktoria Park in Kreuzberg

It has been a little more than one month since I left Germany. I have to admit that my time in Berlin seems like a former life - a month is such a short time and yet I feel as if I haven't seen the Eylauer Strasse or walked around the Viktoriapark for years. Those places remain vivid in my memory, but my year was so well documented that I have stored most of my memories in pictures and have focused my attention on moving forward, first acclimating to a more quiet life at home and then preparing mentally for my last year in Chicago. Not that I do not miss Anna's cheerful 'guten morgens' and Diego's music over breakfast and Judith's charming text messages and knocking on Nancy's door only to find that she could have a full meal ready in five minutes...

Once I come back from a big adventure I have a lot of steps that I like to take to sort of "process" what I've been through. To digest the good moments and memories and be proud of my accomplishments, but also to turn regrets into lessons learned. Part of this processing includes getting pictures printed and making photo albums. This time I am doing four big things - posting final thoughts on this blog, printing some of my favorite pictures to make a scrapbook/album, making a slideshow with this fancy apple technology with some of the video footage I took throughout the year, and finally sending postcards and emails to keep in contact with people I am so happy to have spent time with in Germany. While looking through pictures I have thought of some of my favorites - favorite venues, cafes, moments - and have summarized them here for you. You know, just in case you end up in Berlin at one point in the midst of wild backpacking adventures in Europe. That way you can still get a taste of "my" berlin, even if I'm not there to show it to you personally.

Cafe Bilderbuch, Akazienstrasse, Schöneberg
Favorite Cafes:
1. Cafe Bilderbuch
2. St. Oberholz
3. Cafe Kaulderwelsch/Spörtler Cafe (student cafes at the Freie Uni)
4. Cafe Bateau Ivre
5. Kant Cafe (where Anna worked)

Best turkish brunch place, near Kottbusser Tor

Eierkuchen at the Kant Cafe

Favorite Food places:
1. Aubergine (pizza) on Monumentenstrasse
2. Kumpir at Momo's on the Akazienstrasse
3. Turkish breakfasts at Kottbusser Tor
4. Italian place on the S/W corner of Mehringdamm and Yorckstrasse
5. All-you-can-eat (best american export) brunch place in the Kollwitz Park in Prenzelberg (Kate, what is that place called again??)
6. American Bakery and lunch-spot on Königen-Luise Strasse in Dahlem (again, I'm not remembering names here...)
7. Cafe Hardenberg

Fajitas at Que Pasa

Best Currywurst in Berlin: Curry 36

Kumpir at Momo's

Most-visited movie theaters:
1. CineStar at Potsdamer Platz (original versions)
2. Yorck Kino
3. Xemon (right next to Jullies-Leber Brücke)
4. Odeon Kino
5. Kottbusser Tor (across the street from apartments with fishes painted all over them)

Favorite German Music:
1. Bodo Wartke
2. Seeed, Peter Fox
3. Reinhard Mey
4. Dota und die Stadt Piraten (Kleingeldprinzessa)
5. Wise Guys
6. Wir Sind Helden
7. Fantastische Vier
8. Absolute Beginners

Reinhard Mey, "Bunter Hund" concert tour
Favorite Parks:
1. Viktoriapark Kreuzberg
2. Volkspark Friedrichshein
3. Mauerpark
4. International Park in Marzahn (haven't been there yet, but i've seen pictures!)

Most frequented museums:
1. Berlinische Gallerie
2. Hamburger Bahnhof
3. Alte Nationalgalerie
4. Deutsche historische Museum
5. Martin Gropius Bau

Alte Nationalgalerie (German art since the romantics)
Favorite place to take pictures:
1. Viktoriapark
2. Akazienstrasse
3. Turkish market
4. Market at Winterfeldplatz
5. Kastanienallee Prenzlauerberg
6. Monumentenbrücke near me in Schöneberg
7. East-side Gallery



Best spots for a night out:
1. Klub der Visionaire (club on a boat, in the Spree)
2. Cassiopeia
3. White Trash Fast Food
4. Klub Havana
5. Prater Biergarten Prenzlauer Berg
6. Golgatha Biergarten Viktoriapark
(I really could have done more exploring in this department)


Favorite libraries (this comes with a grain of salt):
1. JFK library FU (more american flags than in the US)
2. History library main building of the HU
3. Ethnology library HU (nice and small)
4. StaBi Potsdamer Platz (if you have the patience for it and don't mind buying water all the time)
5. HU main library (under construction, and is therefore promising for the future)
6. OSI political science library at the FU


But sometimes it's just nice to have something that reminds me of home...
Kate's Kraft Macaroni & Cheese

Alles hat seine Ordnung

There are a few stories that I have been waiting for just the right moment to think back on. One refers directly to the goal of this entire blog, a goal that I set for myself in the "About me" section in which I try to give meaning to the phrase, "Das ist aber wirklich Deutsch".

The story begins two months ago actually, in the middle of library hopping and paper writing. I looked at shoes online as I occasionally do to procrastinate and found the exact red shoes I had been looking for, black heels, about 3", with a dark red leather strap, good for jeans and skirts. So now you know what this story is about. Red shoes. I thought since they rarely have size 36 shoes in stores (I hadn't met any Germans with my same shoe size over the age of 12) I could just order them online and they would arrive just as I was in the final stretch with my papers. A pick-me-up if you will, to get me through a lot of stress and then I could wear them if we go out at the end of the semester (there didn't end up being much time left for this, sadly). So all went simply, and I was expecting them in two weeks. Two weeks went by and I heard no doorbells ring, granted I wasn't home too much during the day since I was busy taking tests, etc. Usually a package will be delivered to any neighbor that answers his/her doorbell when you are not home yourself to pick it up, and then the delivery person would leave a blue note in your mailbox telling you which neighbor (or nearby "Lotto" store) has your package.

Instead of this system, I received a letter saying that someone had been by the apartment not once, not twice, but three times to drop off the package, and I had not been home. For security reasons (they are just shoes for goodness sakes!) the rightful addressee had to sign for them upon delivery. They had a number on the letter, which I called the next day during business hours. They were cordial, asked me if I knew a specific shop on the Dudenstrasse that had a partnership to the delivery company, the Salon Dela. I knew the address - around 12 minutes away walking - and thought that would be fine. It would be there the following Monday after 16.00 and I was to bring a government-issued ID. I was ready to pick up the package on Monday, but realized to my dismay as I walked up to the Salon at the indicated address that Salons were closed on Mondays. I was sure that place must have been the right one, although there were other stores around it, since it shared the aforementioned name of the Salon. I came back the next afternoon, asked at the Salon. They said, quite friendly, "oh no. We do not accept packages here, but the florist across the street just got a contract to do that a couple months ago." OK, I thought. Nothing too complicated. I went to the florist this time and asked a skinny woman perhaps in her early 60's who was standing outside the florist shop if she might have a package for me. Without saying much, she went behind the counter to check for packages - there were two, and one of them looked to be the size of a shoe box. She asked me for my ID, and I took my driver's license out from my wallet. She took one look at it and said, mit der kann ich gar nicht anfangen! And then she threw my driver's license on the counter in front of her and looked up at me, as if I was joking. I was a bit taken aback and said that I am American, and that is my ID. My driver's license. She said, sounding agitated, that is not an ID and I need to give her an ID. I said that that was a government-issued identification. Well, what do you use to cross borders, she asked me. I said my passport, but I don't have it with me. She said, putting the package away, well there's nothing I can do for you, because she is required to see proper identification or a passport. I was at a disadvantage, because all Germans have an identification card, sort of like a citizenship card, that has nothing to do with their passport, and I did not think that I would really need my passport just to pick up a package. I said I would go back to my apartment and get my passport, since there was clearly no way around that. I left the store and said goodbye, not impolitely. We were both quite agitated though, and I had very little time that week to go back and forth a few extra times just for these shoes.

Rather than thinking about the time I had wasted going to and from this place twice with no success, I went to Cafe Bilderbuch to do work that evening. I believe I did get a fair amount of editing done on my first big paper. I had taken an exam the day before and was sure I did not do so well - I had gotten very little sleep over the weekend and was scared, since the professor was essentially writing the test questions just for me; no other students in the class needed to take the test because they would be tested one semester later on multiple courses at once. The system is confusing, and I'm not sure I still understand everything about the combined tests, etc. In any case, I returned to this florist shop on my bike the next afternoon after having been at the FU all day reading for my next paper (finally). I was going to meet Kate that evening for dinner at her apartment and wanted to get everything done before going. So I parked my bike and walked up to the store. The woman was "busy" chatting with a rather large friend of hers with missing teeth. I waited by the door and said hello. She didn't stop her conversation for another five minutes or so and then they said goodbye. The ornery woman asks me, without saying hello, why I did not come back yesterday afternoon. I did not have time to come back yesterday, I responded, so I came back today. She hesitantly went inside and took the package out again and asked if I brought my passport this time. I showed her my passport and she thumbed through the pages, looking confused. No there is no number here! She said - I indicated which page had my information and she said but there's no passport number I need a number. I pointed to the number, thinking that she either wanted to make a big deal about the fact that it was not a German passport or she just didn't like me and did not want to give this package. Or maybe she just really couldn't find it. She told me to read it out loud as she entered it into her little registry machine. I did so twice, she fiddled with some buttons (clearly unsure of how to use the machine) and entered my passport number. I didn't like that one bit - why would they need my passport number in their system to give me the package?!? I waited, and a few beeps and scans of barcodes later, she turns to me and says something I will never forget....

"Na siehst du? Alles hat seine Ordnung!"

That means, don't you see, everything has it's order. Out of anything I'd heard that year, this seemed to me the "most German", taking pride when a foreigner must change his or her ways to cooperate with unnecessary rules, because without them simple things like a package delivery cannot occur. She repeated this and said with a big condescending smile on her face as if she had defeated me and held the power in her hands, "and if you want to return the package, just come back and I will send it back for you, no charge." I smirked back but was relieved to finally be putting the package in my backpack so that I could go home.

However, the exchange was not over yet. As I was fiddling with my zippers, trying to fit the box in my bag, she says "wait wait, do not put your passport away yet. I need it again." Something was not working right with the little registry machine. Apparently my package was still in its inventory, meaning that it had not actually been considered "picked up" yet. So we did it again - I read my number (memorized it by this time) and she entered it, tried scanning barcodes, and no change. She said to me, looking a bit annoyed, perhaps with herself, but she made it seem like I was the one at fault here for having a "faulty" non-German passport. She had me give her the package back and said I would have to come back the next day - she needed to check with the delivery man if it was incorrectly registered with the shoe company, because I was not allowed to take it from the store if it wasn't registered right. She said I should call them and clear up the problem. I told her that I did not have time to call (shouldn't she have done that?!?) and couldn't come back the next day. I had already been there three times (she corrected me, I'd only been there twice, but I didn't feel like explaining about the Salon mix-up) and I did not have any more time that Friday. She said well that's too bad, I needed to come back. She looked at the information on the package and somehow read that they had tried to deliver the package to the apartment before. She made this known to me by saying, "and they came three times and you were not there," shaking her head at me as if to scold me for my wrongdoings. I ignored her condescending comment and replied that I was leaving Germany that weekend and would not have any time to come back. She said well then, I'll just have to send it back myself - I just cannot give this to you now! She was yelling at this point, and I was at my wits end. Then she calmed down and said if I write down the passport information they would figure it out the next day. She would call me at 14.00 and let me know if it worked and then I could pick it up. I couldn't give her a cell phone number though for her to call (heaven forbid), only a landline would do. I knew that I could not be home then and asked instead if I would get my money back if she were to send it back. She said that was for me to arrange with whoever I was getting the package from (but I figured I would for a return like that to a shoe company). In a huff I said I would not leave her my passport number because that information was private. I would appreciate a call the next day, I added, and then I said goodbye and left the store, in desperate need for some fresh air.

I was a bundle of nearly exploding nerves when I got back to the apartment. How did that happen?! I had gotten so far in my German that I knew how to be polite and generally cautious not to say anything that might insult someone. But maybe I said "du" instead of "Sie" the first time I went there, and that is why she reacted negatively to me from the beginning. I told the story to Anna who thought that her behavior had been incredible and unacceptable, but some older Germans are just like that. It was not out of the ordinary to meet people as stubborn as she had been, so whereas I thought it was unheard of, she said everybody met people like that once in a while.

I talked to Jan later that night about it when we met a bunch of people in the Mauerpark for a late-night grill party. At that point I was glad to be done with the whole situation (no regrets about not having those red shoes, in other words. Jan shared in my disbelief and suggested that it had something to do with the fact that I wasn't German. Not specifically that I was American, but that some people are just not willing to bend the rules for non-Germans. There world's are for example too small to know what to look for in a foreign passport. I'm not sure that she was anti-foreign, because she did not know I was foreign until I tried to explain about my driver's license. I think that her rudeness was a cover-up for the fact that she didn't know the rules of the delivery system herself. I see that accepting my driver's license would have been bending the rules a bit, but ultimately it was her fault that her device thing wasn't working properly because I had the right means of identification (the second time). She should have called the delivery company while I was still there. She would not apologize for her inability to work the device; it was my fault right away every time something went wrong. She had TWO packages to worry about, and with one her customer (me) got so fed up that she did not want the merchandise any more. At the least she was being a poor representative both of the delivery company and the shoe company that uses the delivery company. I mean, the delivery company had rules that were too strict in general too - someone needed to sign for the package, they only came to deliver during business hours when people are generally not home (was I supposed to sit and wait at home an entire week for a package?!?), and then they require that we enter very personal information into their database. But I mean, all that could have been much easier had she acted a little less horrific towards me.

This pig-headed way of conducting a business transaction is something that all of my German friends have encountered. They hate it too, and try their best to deal with people like that as little as possible. Robert, who had been living with an entire building of "Spiessers", or people who live within strict sets of rules without hints of kindness or understanding (my definition), decided to move out upon returning to Heidelberg. He does not need to live with people who are unfriendly to students, so he won't. And this brings me to an important conclusion. I noticed an incredible divide between young people and old people in Germany. Young people who I met all over Berlin would repeatedly swear over their frustrations with the close-minded older populations, while the old people talk about the young people who are in the process of "ruining the society" because of their lack of manners. I actually heard an older woman say exactly that to a young couple on a bus, because they wanted the window open and they omitted to ask if she minded the wind. It must be said that I cannot generalize. But just as big as the difference between old and young people in Germany is the difference between one's public (or professional) life and one's private life. One does not often break the barrier from one to the other, for instance by inviting a colleague home for dinner or by asking one's best friend's father for a job.

But I guess everything has its order. It really was an interesting culmination of what has bothered me about Germany from the beginning: general stubbornness. In the public sector (as in not in your personal circle of friends) people do not apologize when they are in the wrong. Instead they redirect the blame or tell you they cannot help you solve your problem. Robert is right, the only amiable people are the bankers, since they wouldn't get any money from you if they were not obliging. That is something that was very new to me this year, realizing that rules are much more bendable in the US and that elsewhere everyday frustrations arise in unlikely places. I remember in the Fall being in a long line to buy groceries in a grocery store. After laying out all of my groceries I went to pay with my debit card. The machine did not accept my card (for no obvious reason that I can think of), and I had no cash. So my card was deemed faulty and I had to pack my stuff in bags, leave it behind the register, go to the nearest ATM (which charged me a 5-euro fee) to get cash, and when I came back I had to wait in line for another ten minutes, take all of my stuff out of the bags, and purchase everything all over again. I wish I can say that these little frustrations teach me some deep life lesson, but really the only thing I learned from that is that I should always have enough cash on me in that grocery store in case it happened again (the next time, my card worked fine). But one thing is clear: rules have no exceptions. Is this indicative of "being German"? How is the need for order, rules and regulations really tied to the German way of life? I know of many instances where I would arrive at a deserted crosswalk with no traffic. Someone would eventually join me just when I make the decision to jay walk across the street. I have repeatedly seen heads shake at me in disapproval at such times. One mother even covered the eyes of her young child as I crossed. I was, however, proud of my American jay-walking ways.

What did I learn from the shoe incident? Well, not to order anything online in Germany, especially using that delivery company, and not to expect that people will recognize American driver's licenses. But maybe the more of those little pieces/hints of advice you collect the easier one's daily life becomes. The red shoes... that was a reminder that although I felt like I had "conquered" the majestic city of Berlin and had survived unscathed, there will always be unexpected frustrations that I cannot expect, that remind me that things would be easier at "home". And in that incident I did come closer to my initial goal of learning what being German really is. Being German means consistently being on the receiving end (like Robert) or on the perpetrating end (like florist shoe lady) of irreproachable stubbornness.

Incidentally, during my first week home I rejoiced at the general ease with which I could do things: make a dentist appointment, set up doctor's check-ups, pick up prescriptions, order printed photographs online, pick up take-out pizza and change my order after I called... I am relieved to be in the land of supreme customer service once again.